The Oscars are so close, we can nearly taste them. When film’s night of nights finally arrives on Sunday, your friends, family and colleagues will become overnight movie experts, sharing their opinions on who should win what and why. If you're looking to fudge your way through this year's Oscars chatter – at dinner/ the water cooler/ on Twitter – we’ve prepared a few handy lines for you to churn out. Think of them as a foolproof script – The Wolf of Wall Street style! – and if all else fails, just turn the question on the asker. Crisis averted.