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Woken up at your girlfriend's house with no clean clothes? Steal these – it’s fine, no one will ever know…
You’ve seen boyfriend jeans right? Those 90s, vintage, Friends-style 'just a pair of baggy bottoms I can wear to Central Perk' jeans are designed to look like they’ve been nicked off of you. So the least you can do is try and steal them back. Watch it, though. They might look slouchy on her, but if they’re cut too tight around the crotch you might end up doing an Adele warble on the way home. Plus, the last thing you want to do is rip a big hole in the rear. They’ll likely come up short as well, so make that a feature by rolling them up at the bottom and teaming with big clompy boots or chunky trainers.
Yeah, we know you’ve got your own at home. But somehow women’s moisturiser feels extra excellent. Probably because: 1) it’s no doubt much more expensive than yours and 2) it smells quite nice at a time of day that you may not. Fair game if it’s out on the bedside, but don’t go rifling around in her bathroom cabinet – that’s just plain rude. Of course, if she’s only got the supermarket stuff, cut your losses and remember to bring yours next time – or get her some good stuff for Christmas.
V-necks, sweaters, hoodies – basically any kind of knitwear from her wardrobe is fair game for you. In fact, bold graphics (unless, of course, they feature big pink unicorns or teddy bears kissing – in which case, take a long hard look at your relationship) are winners for either sex as long as they’re big enough to fit without messing up the fabric. Neutral colours like grey, green or navy blue work best and, who knows, may end up migrating permanently to your flat.
You know the way girls go out looking like they’ve somehow applied an Instagram filter in real life? That’s foundation. It’s one of womankind’s best-kept make-up secrets and, after waking up the morning after a big night out, it’s cat-nip for worn-out complexions. Be brave and ask her how to put it on, though, or you’ll spend the rest of the day channelling Krusty The Clown. And never tell your friends. Ever.
As she’s probably nicked plenty of yours to keep warm in the past, it’s now time for payback. That big, bobbly, ribbed beanie she’s been wearing to work is definitely all good (as is her Ralph Lauren baseball cap, if you can get away with ‘borrowing’ it) because it gives you instant street-style appeal and you won’t have to bother sorting out your bed-head until you get home.
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